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Slut Shaming in BDSM Porn

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donegan01

I started writing a clip description in my head and the words coming to me really bothered me.  The premise of the clip is Nikki gets caught giving blowjobs in the closet at school and is spanked for it. Years ago I wouldn’t have given this a second thought but today, this idea and my involvement in perpetuating this idea hit a nerve.

It’s a common theme in BDSM scenes, women are punished by men for being slutty, women punish each other because they’re fighting over a man….  The language used is always slut shaming.

One of my first SM shoots was with Dan Hawke.  He said on screen “sluts get what sluts deserve”.  Off camera he also said that the mattress against the door was there so no one could hear me scream.  It was one of the shoots I just tried to get through and get the hell out of there.

What was a mindfuck about it was off camera he was super nice.  We drank tea in between scenes and had normal conversation.   While I understand the difference between fantasy and reality I think there is some cross over that can be dangerous.  If an idea is seen over and over again it becomes more real, more relate-able, more likely and less of something that only happens in another universe or on our tv screens…

When I started directing films back in 2000, I had a vision.  I wanted to show that intelligent, strong women could be into kink.  I wanted to give other women an example of a woman making these films, to make work that the women involved would be proud to be associated with, and work that women would feel comfortable watching.  While the action was at times hard, the sets, the atmosphere, the women were all glamorous and pretty.  At first there wasn’t even any nudity in my films.  There was no sexual element other than the fetish itself.  It didn’t need it.  I still believe adding sex waters down fetish; it is inauthentic (to me).

I didn’t have foul language in my films generally.  That was an element Aiden Starr brought to the Vicious Vixxxens line that I didn’t like.  I feel like Dommes should be classy, not trashy.   The 1st installment, “Stuffed, Spanked and Squirted” starring Madison Young, showed the first forced orgasm in one of my films.  It was Madison’s idea and I liked it because it was about the sub’s pleasure.  I wasn’t present for the filming of the strap on scene between Lena Ramon and Aiden Starr in “Penetrating Lena” as I had a costume change and we were about to get kicked out of the studio for going over time.  I was mortified when I sat down to edit the scene.  It came across as non-consensual.  Lena didn’t look like she was enjoying it.  Her body language was stiff, as if she was being raped or abused.  The sounds she was making were totally different than the ones she made in the foot fucking scene earlier.  The dialogue was vulgar, it was really disgusting and difficult for me to watch.  Eventually our creative differences led me to bring on Summer Cummings as the co-Domme.  She got my vision and was brilliant in the two films she starred in.  The scenes were sexy without being degrading to the women in them.

This might seem hypocritical for me to say given the fact that I made a rape film, “Audition”.  While the rape in that film is a metaphor for a woman’s internal struggle to accept her deviant desires, I can’t control what people get from the film or what they do with the images I put in their heads.  Those images are my responsibility.  What I choose to put out into the world is my responsibility.  I feel like I need to start acting more responsibly.

I have been filming a lot fewer scenes with women as submissives of late.  I shot Lori Adorable in a rope bondage scene that is more nurturing than anything else, though the bondage was still very intense.  I shot a scene of a man doing what most would think were degrading activities to a woman that starts with a head shaving but it was presented as being something she needed and consented to, vs something that was being done to her against her will.  Context is important.  Showing consent is important.  Perhaps these scenes won’t sell as well, but I simply can’t stomach putting out certain imagery any more.

Julie Simone

www.JulieSimone.com
www.clips4sale.com/studio/9861





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